Flash Fiction Forward: 80 Very Short Stories

Title: Flash Fiction Forward: 80 Very Short Stories

Authors: Varies

Pages: 240

Genre: Fiction

Grade: B

Synopsis: This book is a collection of flash fiction stores, which are typically the shortest of the short stories. While the definition of flash fiction isn't set in stone, typically the stories are less than 750 words and/or 3 pages in length.

My Review: The variety in this collection is incredible. I enjoyed spending a few minutes reading a story about one topic only to have the next story about something totally different and unrelated, and usually on a topic that I've never read anything about. I found some of the stories to be very good while I didn't like some of the others at all. A few of my favorites were:

• Sashimi Cashmere by Carolyn Forde
• Mandela Was Late by Peter Mehlman
• The Jalapeno Contest by Ray Gonzalez
• Things You Should Know by A. M. Homes
• The Voices in My Head by Jack Handey
• My Date with Neanderthal Woman by David Galef
• The Handbag by Michael Augustin
  

Disclaimer: As the book was written by many different authors, there are a few that are more loose with their language than others.

From the Book: "(p. 72, Tiffany, by Stacey Richter) "Look at her," said a pert little dinoflagellate with a perfectly smooth protein coat. "Look at her with her nose up in the air, refusing to divide.""

"(p. 89, The Old Truth in Costa Rica, by Lon Otto - forgive the language...) It was approaching night, the conversation having taken up the better part of a day. Out of the fragile light a fourth perezoso spoke, the olders and wisest of them, who had to descend to the forest floor on business no more than once every two or three weeks, but then required many hours to accomplish what was necessary. He said, "The truth is this. Dropped casually from the safety of our beloved branches, our shit would be merely shit. Hard and shapely as our patient nature makes it, it is still shit. But when we plant it in the ground where the jaguar walks, it becomes precious as jewels.""

"(p. 48, The Jalapeno Contest, by Ray Gonzalez - Typically I only share a paragraph or two (and I only share one paragraph here), but the whole story is contained in a single paragraph.) Freddy and his brother Tesoro have not seen each other in five years, and they sit at the kitchen table in Freddy's house and have a jalapeno contest. A large bowl of big green and orange jalapeno peppers sit between the two brothers. A saltshaker and two small glasses of beer accompany this feast. When Tesoro nods his head, the two men begin to eat the raw jalapenos. The contest is to see which man can eat more peppers. It is a ritual from their father, but the two brothers tried it only once, years ago. Both quit after two peppers and laughed it off. This time, things are different. They are older and have to prove a point. Freddy eats his first one more slowly than Tesoro, who takes two bites to finish his and is now on his second. Neither says anything, though a close study of each man's face would tell you the sudden burst of jalapeno energy does not waste time in changing the eater's perception of reality. Freddy works on his second as Tesoro rips into his fourth. Freddy is already sweating from his head and is surprised to see that Tesoro's fat face has not changed its steady, consuming look. Tesoro's long, black hair is neatly combed, and not one bead of sweat has popped out. He is the first to sip from the beer before hitting his fifth jalapeno. Freddy leans back as the table begins to sway in his damp vision. He coughs, and a sharp pain rips through his chest. Tesoro attempts to laugh at his brother, but Freddy sees it is something else. As Freddy finishes his third jalapeno, Tesoro begins to breathe faster upon swallowing his sixth. The contest momentarily stops as both brothers shift in their seats and the sweat pours down their faces. Freddy clutches his stomach as he reaches for his fourth delight. Tesoro has now taken his seventh, and it is clear to Freddy that his brother is suffering big-time. There is a bright blue bird sitting on Tesoro's head, and Tesoro is struggling to laugh because Freddy has a huge red spider crawling on top of his head. Freddy wipes the sweat from his eyes and finishes his fourth pepper. Tesoro sips more beer, sprinkles salt on the tip of his jalapeno, and bites it down to the stem. Freddy, who has not touched his beer, stares in amazement as two Tesoros sit in front of him. They both rise hastily, their beer guts pushing the table against Freddy, who leans back as the two Tesoros waver in the kitchen light. Freddy hears a tremendous fart erupt from his brother, who sits down again. Freddy holds his fifth jalapeno and can't breathe. Tesoro's face is purple, but the blue bird has been replaced by a burning flame of light that weaves over Tesoro's shiny head. Freddy is convinced that he is having a heart attack as he watches his brother fight for breath. Freddy bites into his fifth as Tesoro flips his eighth jalapeno into his mouth, stem and all. This is it. Freddy goes into convulsions and drops to the floor as he tries to reach for his glass of beer. He shakes on the dirty floor as the huge animal that is Tesoro pitches forward and throws up millions of jalapeno seeds all over the table. The last thing Freddy sees before he passes out is his brother's body levitating above the table as an angel, dressed in green jalapeno robes, floats into the room, extends a hand to Tesoro, and floats away with him. When Freddy wakes up minutes later, he gets up and makes it to the bathroom before his body lets go through his pants. As he reaches the bathroom door, he turns and gazes upon the jalapeno plants growing healthy and large on the kitchen table, thick peppers hanging under their leaves, their branches immersed in the largest pile of jalapeno seeds Freddy has ever seen."