Expecting Adam

Title: Expecting Adam

Author: Martha Beck

Pages: 324

Genre: Memoir

Grade: B+

Synopsis: Martha Beck reminisces about her second pregnancy. She and her husband were both PhD students at Harvard and the fact that they had one child and another on the way alienated them from many of their professors and students. During Martha's pregnancy, she and her husband shared many strange experiences. She felt that something was wrong with her baby and had amniocentesis done which confirmed that her baby had Down's syndrome. Everybody in the Harvard community wanted and expected her to get an abortion. Martha feels that Adam was able to communicate with her from the womb and that he sent spirits to help her through her hard times.

My Review: This is a great story. I feel that it is one that you must take with a grain of salt, because she makes claims of many strange, other-worldly experiences throughout her pregnancy. Even if only half of the stories are true, Adam is an amazing child that seems to have protection from the other side of the veil. I really like that she came to a decision to believe anything that has not been proven to not be true. I don't have many opportunities to interact with people with Down's syndrome but when I read books like this, I realize that there is a whole lot more going on with them than is first apparent.

FYI: Martha Beck is the daughter of Hugh Nibley. In a 2005 book she accuses him of sexually abusing her. While she didn't leave the church until 1993 - and her experiences written in Expecting Adam took place in the '80s, it is clear from the book that she was not a practicing Mormon at the time of his birth. Martha and her husband first co-authored a prominent LDS book about overcoming homosexuality. 5 years ago, Martha and her husband John Beck divorced and both publicly announced that they were homosexuals. As for the sexual abuse, only her, her father and God know the truth of the accusations.

From the Book: "(p. 78) And thus I learned that at Harvard, while knowing a great deal is the norm and knowing everything is the goal, appearing to know everything is an acceptable substitute. I pondered this great truth during the two-hour seminar. I was so buoyed up by it that I didn't pay enough attention to snorkeling up little bits of food in order to keep my nausea under control. I sailed right on into my next class, another seminar, confident that I could get through it without losing my lunch."

"(p. 124) Occasionally, especially at celebratory times, the whole gang of us would launch into a spontaneous mental game. For example, my mother used to send me to the back porch (a room containing no furniture but a simply incredible mass of Stuff) to get flour for holiday cakes or pies. I often returned to the kitchen, cringing with disgust, to announce that the flour was full of worms. No matter how sick this made me, I knew it wuoldn't bother my mother. She always just sifted the worms out, saying that even if she missed a few and they got into the food, they would simply be an excellent source of protein. Just as we were all beginning to feel thoroughly downtrodden, my father would save the day. "Everyone come up with a literary reference about worms!" he would shout."

"(p. 161) It was the first time I had spoken to them directly. In doing so, I felt myself cross a fine but very distinct line, the line between speculating about the existence of a metaphysical plane of some sort and climbing aboard for the ride. I knew I had let go of my sanity. It was terrifying. I only did it because my fear of what was happening to my body had become greater than my fear of holding on to rational beliefs."

"(p. 238) I also thought about that seminar classmate on Adam's ninth birthday. Adam had insisted on going to a pizza-and-games arcade for his party. The only person he'd invited besides his sisters was someone I'll call Lonnie, whom Adam claimed to be his girlfriend. Although I had often heard Adam sing about Lonnie, I had never met her, or seen Adam interact with any girl. I was afraid that he would start humping her leg the second she came in range. These were fears I'd sustained since before he was born; I though all people with Down syndrome were grossly overaffectionate. I was grossly wrong."

"(p. 284) "Most people go through their whole lives," John went on, "and never have one miracle happen to them. You've had dozens and dozens, and you still want more! It's like God gives you a brownie, I mean a really good brownie, but you can't be content with it. You want the whole pan of brownies. Nobody gets that.""